People who stand infront of the doors when you're trying to get off the tube.

When you're at a bus stop in a queue and when the bus comes people try to bus to the front.

When people sit on the asile seat and then put their bag on the inside seat so you cant sit down.

Transport wankers

My mate took a date and she opened her bag and pulled out a square pie meal.
Not sure if he was impressed or disgusted.

Fat people who can't put their arms by their sides while walking down the middle of the pavement. Their arms have to swing out at a 90 degree angle to their body making overtaking a hazardous and drawn out affair.

Just right for watching Spaghetti Westerns

So the electricity leaks out?

Bosses who completely skew the balance between minor administrative issues and actual output.

Example:

Come in every day after 9am but do a 50 hour week and receive platitudes from internal and external stakeholders = disciplinary action.

Come in dead on 9am, spend exactly seven hours in the office and do nothing but spend your time wandering about, on your mobile or on Facebook = promotion, unfettered overtime and smoke blown up your arse.

I guess that's to stop people sharing accounts. You can download your playlists and listen offline to avoid (just have to connect every 30 days)

Getting on a crowded train but a few seats are available through the carriage. Person in front stops at first one but rather than sitting down and getting out the facking way decides to take coat off, sort their bag, etc. meanwhile, all seats fill up from people coming down from other end of carriage.

Best of You by the Foo Fighters

People who insist on making a mad dash across a busy street forcing drivers to brake when there is a zebra crossing not more than ten yards away.

On a 2 lane motorway, uphill (yes M11, I'm looking at you)

You would enjoy Death Race 2000.

Are you saying punctuality is less important than productivity?

Parents who do their children's school artwork. Especially the ones who are found out when their little darling says, 'Mummy, you didn't do the bricks very well'. What's the f****** point. She's 8 years of age. Just let her do it herself and butt out. If it's crap (which it will be), it's crap. That's the joy.

Bookkeepers that don't understand how prepayments work meaning you've got to go through all the accounts again before preparing the monthly management accounts for the board.

(sorry, bit specialist :D)

And diagonally as well. Why not straight - it's quicker and safer.

People at work booking their car in for service and without even prompting reeling off the numberplate in the phonetic alphabet..

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo India November Golf Tango Whisky Alpha Tango Sierras...the lot of em.

An incident in the supermarket carpark annoyed the hell out of me. As I headed down the row to my car I passed an elderly lady clearly waiting in her car for someone to leave. It turns out the next person to leave, clearly her target was in the space next to me. I dropped my stuff in the boot and, got in and turned the key. In the time taken to do my seat belt the other other car pulled out . No problem, they were there first, Before I could move though the old lady moved up and ensured I couldn't move before spending the next two or three minutes wiggling herself into the space. If she had been patient I could have left inside 20 seconds leaving her with... at least most of the space her driving skills or lack of them required. Why?

Pedestrians in the road using mobile phones. Complete f*cking idiots.
Pavement cyclists. Nearly got hit by one as I came out my garden this morning, he was doing about 20mph. I think it's one of those instances where kicking them over is absolutely justified. Morons.

Rail commuters who moan about commuting. It's always been shit and always will be shit, if you don't like it either use a different mode of transport, or get a job somewhere else that is more local to you where you don't need to get the train.