Nah, countryfile is good most of the time

One Show is dog shit I agree

Lending somebody a video recorder for a while and 8 months later they've still got it.

Overrated professional Welsh persons,overloud singers,step forward,Tom Jones and Shirley Bassey

The concept of sending Christmas cards. What is the point???!

I maybe getting old, but I enjoy countryfile, its good Sunday night tv.

Alex Jones on the other hand inevitably has a collapsed minge, and is just a truly awful presenter.

Being compelled to attend work Christmas do's. Why would I actively choose to sit at a crappy restaurant with people i spend all my time with at an overpriced crappy restaurant and eat rubber turkey?!

Secret Santa. Not sure what's so fun about having to buy a present for someone I've met about 3 times.

Having to say "have a good weekend" to colleagues when leaving on a Friday. Quite honestly I couldn't give a crap how their weekends are

Spitting

To send seasons greetings ?

Aren't you a little ray of sunshine.

Bars that only employ two or three people behind the bar on a Saturday night when it's obviously going to be rammed.

When someone is forever on their mobile telecommunications device when in your company but cannot be bothered to answer a phone call or text from you when they are with others.

Mature/ Vintage cheddar. If I'm going to buy cheese that someone has dared to call either Mature or Vintage, I want it to remove the skin off the roof of my f***ing mouth when I eat it. I do not want to waste money because some dozy bint behind a deli counter has sworn blind that this is 'the strongest cheddar' they do, only to get home and find out that my socks have got more flavour. The c-units that grade cheddar strength either need to get their act together or f***ing choke to death on some of their insipid offerings!

From BBS

"Nail on head" or humorous variants
"Kick on"
"Pullis, Parrish and Bolassie"
Any confusion with the 25 man squad, its very simple


From world
Social Media
"Can I get"
"Enjoy your meals" (we are having a meal)

Some religious views on relationships

'......the next level'. Say it in front of me, and I will stab you in the eye with a pencil.

That one makes me so ******* angry. If someone said it to me, I'd tell the **** "fine, come around here and GET it yourself" can't stand these Americanisms.

People that pronounce "z" "zee" and "zebra" "zee bra". ******* DO ONE , it its a "zee-o" is it? stop trying to be clever and a bit different. We're British. Enjoy it.

Dan Snow. Over privileged, right wing, posh boy c-unit. Seems to be on every programme now days. Twunt of the first degree, absolutely makes my skin crawl.

Not being able to sleep :S:

Is he? Had a look and couldn't see anything that said he was right wing or a Tory. He is a great, great, grandson of a liberal prime minister (lloyd george), an ambassador for electoral reform and a humanist.

Are you just confusing your own class bias with fact? I genuinely went and tried to find out his political affiliations and couldn't see anything beyond the AV vote and the Lib Dems

Still an annoying **** though. From the Ben Fogle school of annoying *****.

That you can have

People who buy a pint of milk and a paper and pay by card. Go to cashpoint and cause a queue somewhere else pal, I haven't got all day

People who go to the cashpoint, put every card in their wallet in the machine, check the balance on each one and print a mini statement, top their phone up then put the first one back in to get a fiver out to buy a pint of milk and a ******* paper.

Paying £110 to a dishwasher repair bloke and it packs in again 2 days later. He then comes back out to say another part needs replacing so another £60. Mrs says I'll speak to my husband. Husband cancels £110 chq forthwith with bank

See how he likes them apples

He can't have any apples, he's £110 out. :p

the boy london logo really don't know how they got away with a knock off of the third Reich

isn't he just on telly because his dad got him a job at the BBC?

PS on topic: nepotism

Precisely. ****.

I had the exact same thing with my phone. 160 quid to get it fixed, breakers 2 days later, same problem, and they say its not their problem.

Scum. Sub-human scum.

Selfish use of communal microwaves

Christmas Jumpers, oh look another chance for social media to absolutely beat the arse out of something.

People seeking change in their wallet / purse / pocket when buying a few items, when they could just use their card's touch'n'go facility and have paid in seconds.

:angel:

When you're nearly done with copying 200GB worth of files to another drive (taking a few hours) and someone turns your computer off, forcing you to start over. Fuming.

When you're business alarm goes off and you are called by the alarm monitoring team, you tell them it's not a problem as you know the cause, yet they still inform the police who turn up and decide its a false alarm - of course it was I'd told the monitoring staff. Consequently the police deem that it was an alarm malfunction - which it wasn't - and will no longer respond to alarms unless we buy a new alarm system. If we wish to re-utilise the existing wiring then the only alarm company willing to do so is the ***** who ****ed it up in the first place.
They **** up and as a direct result I've got to spend a shed load with them on new gear which only they will agree to install.

******* *****.

Great start to today. Improved only by our dishwasher suffering catestrophic failure. Culminating in a puncture on my Range Rover on the way to buy a replacement dish washer.

Grrrr.

The Croydon Advertiser web site at present. Im trying to read it on my IPhone and keep getting a pensions regulator advert pop up. I shut it down the up it pops again ! I have block pop ups enabled !

You might wanna try disabling popups then ... ?

Is there much use of communal microwaves that isn't selfish? In my experience people end up heating the most ridiculously pungent nonsense resulting in the whole office stinking for hours.

The only things it's ok to heat are tea/coffee and perhaps plain porridge in the morning.

:D

I should have said pop ups blocked is enabled

I'm sure it's been said, but anyone who starts a sentence with "I'm not being funny but..."

This is invariably followed by something which clearly is trying to be funny, or something which could never be described as remotely funny to begin with.

Mates girlfriends.
Unnecessary kissing hello/goodbye

The media hype around ANY England game

110%. As in: "The lads gave it 110%".

Lets say it was possible to give 110%, why stop there? What about giving it 120%, 150% or even 176%.

One from yesterday.......daughter booked hire car with child seat. Forget the fact that it took 45 mins to get seen, due to there only being one woman at the counter who encountered a stroppy woman before us. (Ok dont ask why the two out the back doing bugger all did not step in but that would show a little Customer Service I have given up expecting that, I had assumed they were not trained but nope one was the manager (sorry wrong word any decent manager would have sorted it way earlier))
Anyway that might of annoyed me a little but it was trumped when they came out with car set hired for £30 (dont go there) and placed it next to car. No sir we dont fit it in we are not allowed. So you charge for hire but do not fit, ok have you got instructions to fit seat. Had they no, so they go get another seat with instructions, (no that was broken) Third seat arrives two screaming kids , stressed daughter now running 90 minutes late, no instructions. At which point I was ready to scream. However it eventually was fitted. Dont give me Health Safety some law or other it would be more unsafe if it was not fitted properly.

What annoys me the lack of Customer Care and Service shown by some firms.

People say a million percent and a million and one percent. Stupid bastards.

People who get annoyed about cheese. :)

But it's a load of old bollocks surely? If there really was a serious risk they would take everyone's phones off them at check in or security, turn them off and give them back to you at your destination. How they would do that I don't know but they'd have to if it really was a problem. Some stewardess after she was allowed to leave her seat came and told me to stop taking photos out of the window after take off. How many videos are there on You Tube of passengers filming take offs and landing on various devices? Thousands. Not seen any Air Crash Investigations on TV of any aircraft being brought down because someone is playing Angry Birds yet.

It's all bollocks.

People that are simply unable to keep to their side of a single track road. **** me you take your life in your hands every time you go out around here these days.

Learn how to drive you absolute ******* muppets! :grrr:

Do as you're told. :hi:

I rarely listen to music stations but I've had the misfortune to tune in to Christian O'Connell who, along with his sycophantic posse (didn't that shit die out 20 years ago?) seems to find anything a celebrity guest says side splittingly hilarious.

O'Connell: "So, Noel Gallagher, do you ever use public transport?"
Noel Gallagher "I always use the tube"
O'Connell "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!"

O'Connell: "Dave Grohl's in the studio, Dave, how are you finding the UK?"
Dave Grohl: "Yeah, it's cool I guess"
O'Connell "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!"

Bob Geldof: "It's been a shit year. First Peaches, now thousands dying in Africa from ebola and nobody caring."
O'Connell "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!"

****.

How I spent 16 years of my life ignoring hip-hop. I'm making an effort this week to get into it and there's some good stuff out there. Stereotypes are bad.

I said similar earlier on in the thread.

They are all complete tossers.

Oh I do, I wouldn't want the flight to have to make an emergency landing. "This is your captain speaking, brace brace brace because some wanker is on the BBS" :D

Foldy-bike ****wits
Umbrella arseholes
Big bag bastards
I don't have to queue qunts
Anyone who gets on my train at Catford Bridge

Things that annoy you
 

People with clipboards in town centres.

And on a slightly similar note, people that hover.

I work outside and members of the public often pass by with the odd "good morning" or the classically hilarious "you've missed a bit!"

These interactions are fine with me. Water off a duck's back. What is annoying is when people stop dead in their tracks, right in the middle of where you are working, and just stare. Not say anything, but watch. Now that my friends, is VERY annoying.

People who leave an imaginary car space between them and the car in front in a traffic queue.

Why? Why do that?

And why does it annoy me so much? I have no idea. It just does.

I do that Barb,just in case I need space to make a quick break out getaway

There's an old school hip hop thread on the music forum. Good stuff on that.

People in their 40's that "like" modern music to try and make themselves feel younger.

People that go into a state of panic when they "lose" their mobile phone.

A lot of countries don't ban mobile phone use on planes apparently.So you are right.

Ok.

People who do it not because they want to get a quick getaway, but the ones who do it just to annoy me.

:D

Perhaps their imaginary friend recently passed his test?

You're bound to get wound up by it though - you drive an Audi and all Audi drivers are aggressive stress-balls on legs.

I don't drive an Audi!

Wash your mouth out!

My mate has been texting me pictures of his business class experience on Aer Lingus to the States all afternoon, so they clearly don't.

Although I haven't heard from him for a few hours now. :eek:

BMW then. Wanted an Audi but couldn't afford it - no wonder you're wound up. :)

Mr B has the Audi - I have a BMW.

Not a case of couldn't afford it - I just didn't like the X5 equivalent :p

I leave about half a car length.

Sometimes the car in front breaks down.
Or not looking as the traffic moves off.
Or looking in the glove box for a pack of ciggies.
Or they set off in reverse gear.
Or they are insurance fraudsters.

Sometimes you might be shunted from behind. You don't want damage at both ends do you?

In fact I cant think of a single sensible reason why you wouldn't leave space!

Surprised you two don't have road rage on your drive every morning. :)

Gemma Collins! Ignorant and talentless. World gone mad!

We do. It's murder if we drive towards each other unexpectedly :D

Check out the oldskool hiphop thread. Some gems on there.

If you dont drive an automatic its tiring on the ankles to keep moving

wifi innit

Scousers/Mancs who treat the English team like it's from another country. Grow up.

Crude double entendres.

Wimps.

Translation: wcb

Not being able to have a dump in peace due to chronic masterbaters going at it in neighbouring cubicles.

And vice versa

Things that annoy you
 

Women who post 'moments' on Tinder.

Look, we are men. We swipe right because it saves time. We don't play the game properly and judge. It's all swipe right till carpel tunnel syndrome. And take the nose ring out. You are not Be-bop or Rocksteady.

another internet dating (or profile pic) related thing: SIF's. You aren't fooling anyone.

Also lardarses who describe themselves as 'curvy' or 'voluptuous'

Stop describing yourself as such then. :p

I'm just big boned... :o




21 BMI in all seriousness

Don't worry mate, I'm into 'curvy'.

You mean "chronic dumpers"?

When you have looked in your mirror and seen the bloke behind doing somersaults trying to stop only to realise he can't make it and has to fly down the outside grassy bit, then you leave yourself an out ball.

.. and tw@ts who insist on wearing their rucksacks on their backs on crowded buses and trains.

Book readers who insist on doing it on a packed train.
Newspaper readers who insist on holding the paper open double paged on a packed train.

Packed train people, in general.

People who don't look where they are going.

Tyrannous liberalism

The poor quality face paint in my local balloon shop meaning i have to smother its in vaseline on match days now. It's not so much the sheen it gives off or the moistness it's more the money aspect. The price we pay for looking good though.

Songs that rhyme baby and crazy. Stop it.

Can't find a decent red and blue wig and foamy hand anywhere these days either. Broken Britain.

TV ads for online bingo

Back on my running theme on idiot step kids.....when the so called adult one (20 years old) cannot be arsed to raise himself out of bed to take the ten year old to school, while his mother is at the hospital. To then follow it up with the most feeble excuse ever as to why he couldn't make it to work, when it was apparent all week that he would need to sort alternative travel arrangements.......absolutely ******* useless :veryangry :veryangry

Ched Evans sex case

Prob been mentioned already but needs saying again anyway:
People on packed trains who put bag on seat and get arsey when you ask them to move it - did you get a ticket for the bag mate? No you fecking didn't and there is nowhere else to sit you selfish wan*er
People who talk loudly on their phones on trains with their inane drivel - keep yr fecking voice down I don't want to listen but can't fecking help it because you are so LOUD. Better still why not make the call somewhere else.