You must wank a lot

Honours list generally. An honour of any sort carries absolutely no cache any more. They are just dished out to minor celebrities willy nilly for doing their jobs. I know a few totally undeserving people with honours and I still can't work out why they gor them

Not many Malaga shirts to buy in the markets here. Luckily he seems to have disappeared off the radar.

They like to report on anything football wise that has a hint of Chile in it. Although Chile utterly failed to qualify for the WC they will consule themselves that two former Chilean team managers will be at the WC. They will get a touch of glory transference from that.

Women cant stand their men being idle for long periods.

She has popped off to spend a couple of hours with the grandkid. I use the time to piss about on the BBS. Then I get up and clean the house from top to bottom, she doesnt know that. I check my phone to see 5 missed calls. This means - why dont you leave the house and join me for a walk in 30 degree heat.

I ask her what she wants, and she puts the phone down pissed off. If you are going to do that, why call five times.

She will call me pesado, and then thank me grudgingly for cleaning the house.

She has trouble relaxing herself.

Sometimes I hark for my single days. I am already missing work.

People commentating on my eating: ‘oh he must have been hungry, oh don’t you like it, oh he’s certainly cleaned his plate ‘

People who make a noise when yawning.

While we’re at it, ‘Zander’ Armstrong (which in itself is annoying) saying ‘it’s a goodnight from Richard and a goodnight from me, goodnight

While we're at it - why does said Armstrong when the contestants fail in the final always inform them that, no they did not find a pointless answer so they don't win the dosh ?

While we're at it - why does said Armstrong when the contestants fail in the final always inform them that, no they did not find a pointless answer so they don't win the dosh ?

BH you have double-posted....you don't win the dosh.

That stupid nationwide advert

**** off

Damn you autocorrect. :)

Early games. Nearly always a bit shit.

This can get to ****, always thought it was very impolite. Yes I eat a lot, spare me the song and dance

Are you 5? Or a dog?

2017. Thank a non-specific deity that it's nearly done.

Terrible and great for me in equal parts. First six months very stressful, second cruising.

A reminder of all my faults. I've had fun but find myself starting again, again, worse off according to any scale you would use to measure.

Return her and buy a new one.

We give a mate of mine stick for his trade ins.

Too old and out of funds to invest in a new one. And I get a lot of mileage on a tank of fuel on this one.

Bad penalty decisions