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Estate agents saying 'baller'. Hope they choke on their coleslaw.
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Noisy eaters ,
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Use of the word 'freaking'. Either swear properly or don't ******* swear at all you *****.
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TV producers who allow the football cameras to linger on the goalkeeper five minutes after he's released the ball, whilst all sorts of stuff happens elsewhere on the pitch.
This is of course counterbalanced by those who instruct the cameramen to scour the crowd for large knockered beauties. |
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I've sworn at the TV more than a few times the last few years over this one. Maybe it is because there are so many games being covered at one time there are not enough true football game producers/directors out there, and they don't understand the way football should be watched. |
Drivers who cannot do a right hand turn until there is no traffic visible for at least half a mile
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The phrase "grinds my gears".
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And those are turning right to join a road, that seem to forget (or ignore) who has right of way - and expect YOU to give way because they've angled themselves across your path. I particularly enjoy (very slowly) manoeuvring around this special kind of ****wit - and smirking back at the dagger looks coming my way. More often than not it seems to be a woman in a Range Rover or an elderly chap in a Merc. I would describe myself as a fairly courteous driver, but I don't give an inch to wankers that try to bully courtesy out of other road users. |
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Youngsters, usually girls and women, that throw in the word 'like' at every opportunity.
"I was like so happy that he was like really into me. I couldn't believe it Gemma! It was like totes amazeballs!" People that the use words such as 'totes', 'amazeballs' and the dreaded 'oh em gee'. |
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People who say absolutely , instead of yes
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"And I was like, duhhhh, HELLO?!" |
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Just saying |
Commentators talking about sportsmen 'taking fluids on board'
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Football managers who constantly refer to "the football club". Why can't they just say "the club".
Golf commentators & players who talk about "the golf course". Why can't they just say "the course". After all where else do they play? |
Adults that watch superhero films / read Harry Potter style books and not for their children, particularly when they waffle on about how amazing they are.
Spiderman is the intellectual level of my 4 year old daughter. I don't want to hear some ******* ****** gibbering inanely about how great the film is. If you struggle to follow a real plot then go buy some crayons to keep yourself amused and keep your mouth shut. |
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