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cupid stunt 11-12-2014 11:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by New LP (Post 12110739)
Although people who bunch together at the front of the carriage/bus when there is plenty of room further down are also annoying. As are people who have to stand up on a train and make for the exit when it is several minutes away from the destination.

Then they say excuse me even though you clearly can't move until the doors open and people start getting off

New LP 12-12-2014 12:00 AM

Waiters who keep coming over and try and top up your beer/wine glass from the bottle while you are eating, a ridiculous number of times. Because you do that it doesn't mean I will buy more!

kayjay 12-12-2014 12:08 AM

Lack of escalator etiquette.
Those pairs of tossers who stand side by side ignorant to those in a hurry.
Want to throw them back down the bastard as they get to the top.

kayjay 12-12-2014 12:24 AM

People who start sentences "I'm the kind of person who..."

PeterH 12-12-2014 12:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cupid stunt (Post 12110581)
Reminds me of this letter of complaint sent

Dear Jetstar...
Do you like riddles? I do, that's why I'm starting this letter with one. What weighs more than a Suzuki Swift, less than a Hummer and smells like the decaying anus of a deceased homeless man? No idea? How about, what measures food portions in kilograms and has the personal hygiene of a French prostitute? Still nothing? Right, one more try. What's fat as f***, stinks like shit and should be forced to purchase two seats on a Jetstar flight? That's right, it's the man I sat next to under on my flight from Perth to Sydney yesterday.
As I boarded the plane, I mentally high-fived myself for paying the additional $25 for an emergency seat. I was imagining all that extra room, when I was suddenly distracted by what appeared to be an infant hippopotamus located halfway down the aisle.
As I got closer, I was relieved to see that it wasn't a dangerous semi-aquatic African mammal, but a morbidly obese human being. However, this relief was short-lived when I realised that my seat was located somewhere underneath him.
Soon after I managed to burrow into my seat, I caught what was to be the first of numerous fetid whiffs of body odour. His scent possessed hints of blue cheese and Mumbai slum, with nuances of sweaty flesh and human faeces sprayed with cologne - Eau No.
Considering I was visibly under duress, I found it strange that none of the cabin crew offered me another seat. To be fair, it's entirely possible that none of them actually saw me. Perhaps this photo will jog their memories.
Pinned to my seat by a fleshy boulder, I started preparing for a 127 Hours-like escape. Thankfully though, the beast moved slightly to his left, which allowed me to stand up, walk to the back of the plane and politely ask the cabin crew to be seated elsewhere. I didn't catch the names of the three flight attendants, but for the purpose of this letter, I'll call them: Chatty 1, Chatty 2 and Giggly (I've given them all the same surname - Couldnotgiveash***).
After my request, Chatty 1 and Chatty 2 continued their conversation, presumably about how s*** they are at their jobs, and Giggly, well, she just giggled. I then asked if I could sit in one of the six vacant seats at the back of the aircraft, to which Giggly responded, "hehehe, they're for crew only, hehehe". I think Giggly may be suffering from some form of mental impairment.
I tried to relocate myself without the assistance of the Couldnotgiveas*** triplets, but unfortunately everyone with a row to themselves was now lying down. It was then I realised that my fate was sealed. I made my way back to Jabba the Hutt and spent the remainder of the flight smothered in side-boob and cellulite, taking shallow breaths to avoid noxious gas poisoning. Just before landing,
I revisited the back of the plane to use the toilet. You could imagine my surprise when I saw both "crew only" rows occupied by non-crew members. I can only assume Giggly let them sit there after she forgot who she was and why she's flying on a big, shiny metal thing in the sky.
Imagine going out for dinner and a movie, only to have your night ruined by a fat mess who eats half your meal then blocks 50% of the screen. Isn't that exactly the same as having someone who can't control their calorie intake occupying half your seat on a flight? Of course it is, so that's why I'm demanding a full refund of my ticket, including the $25 for an emergency row seat.
I'm also looking to be compensated for the physical pain and mental suffering caused by being enveloped in human blubber for four hours. My lower back is in agony and I had to type this letter one-handed as I'm yet to regain full use of my left side. If I don't recover completely, I'll have to say goodbye to my lifelong dream of becoming Air Guitar World Champion. If that occurs, you will pay.

To discuss my generous compensation package, email me at: richwisken@hotmail.com, or tweet me at: @RichWisken

No regards,

Rich Wisken.

TBF. That's about spot on for cabin crew. It's amazing the didain you get from their eyes should you interrupt their 'break time - seemingly 8 hours on long haul' to ask for another small bottle of wine. I tend to ask different crew members in order to avoid that look becoming complete loathing.

Far East Eagle 12-12-2014 12:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cupid stunt (Post 12110581)
Reminds me of this letter of complaint sent

Dear Jetstar...
Do you like riddles? I do, that's why I'm starting this letter with one. What weighs more than a Suzuki Swift, less than a Hummer and smells like the decaying anus of a deceased homeless man? No idea? How about, what measures food portions in kilograms and has the personal hygiene of a French prostitute? Still nothing? Right, one more try. What's fat as f***, stinks like shit and should be forced to purchase two seats on a Jetstar flight? That's right, it's the man I sat next to under on my flight from Perth to Sydney yesterday.
As I boarded the plane, I mentally high-fived myself for paying the additional $25 for an emergency seat. I was imagining all that extra room, when I was suddenly distracted by what appeared to be an infant hippopotamus located halfway down the aisle.
As I got closer, I was relieved to see that it wasn't a dangerous semi-aquatic African mammal, but a morbidly obese human being. However, this relief was short-lived when I realised that my seat was located somewhere underneath him.
Soon after I managed to burrow into my seat, I caught what was to be the first of numerous fetid whiffs of body odour. His scent possessed hints of blue cheese and Mumbai slum, with nuances of sweaty flesh and human faeces sprayed with cologne - Eau No.
Considering I was visibly under duress, I found it strange that none of the cabin crew offered me another seat. To be fair, it's entirely possible that none of them actually saw me. Perhaps this photo will jog their memories.
Pinned to my seat by a fleshy boulder, I started preparing for a 127 Hours-like escape. Thankfully though, the beast moved slightly to his left, which allowed me to stand up, walk to the back of the plane and politely ask the cabin crew to be seated elsewhere. I didn't catch the names of the three flight attendants, but for the purpose of this letter, I'll call them: Chatty 1, Chatty 2 and Giggly (I've given them all the same surname - Couldnotgiveash***).
After my request, Chatty 1 and Chatty 2 continued their conversation, presumably about how s*** they are at their jobs, and Giggly, well, she just giggled. I then asked if I could sit in one of the six vacant seats at the back of the aircraft, to which Giggly responded, "hehehe, they're for crew only, hehehe". I think Giggly may be suffering from some form of mental impairment.
I tried to relocate myself without the assistance of the Couldnotgiveas*** triplets, but unfortunately everyone with a row to themselves was now lying down. It was then I realised that my fate was sealed. I made my way back to Jabba the Hutt and spent the remainder of the flight smothered in side-boob and cellulite, taking shallow breaths to avoid noxious gas poisoning. Just before landing,
I revisited the back of the plane to use the toilet. You could imagine my surprise when I saw both "crew only" rows occupied by non-crew members. I can only assume Giggly let them sit there after she forgot who she was and why she's flying on a big, shiny metal thing in the sky.
Imagine going out for dinner and a movie, only to have your night ruined by a fat mess who eats half your meal then blocks 50% of the screen. Isn't that exactly the same as having someone who can't control their calorie intake occupying half your seat on a flight? Of course it is, so that's why I'm demanding a full refund of my ticket, including the $25 for an emergency row seat.
I'm also looking to be compensated for the physical pain and mental suffering caused by being enveloped in human blubber for four hours. My lower back is in agony and I had to type this letter one-handed as I'm yet to regain full use of my left side. If I don't recover completely, I'll have to say goodbye to my lifelong dream of becoming Air Guitar World Champion. If that occurs, you will pay.

To discuss my generous compensation package, email me at: richwisken@hotmail.com, or tweet me at: @RichWisken

No regards,

Rich Wisken.

what was their response?

cupid stunt 12-12-2014 12:52 AM

I don't think they responded to this complaint :D

Far East Eagle 12-12-2014 12:56 AM

I really do hate air travel The worse I had was Air India where the air hostesses blocked us from leaving the plane until every wanker had disembarked first. I was raging, which was only soothed slightly by remembering that my on flight Kosher meal had been beef :)

KYLIE MINEAGLE 12-12-2014 01:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Far East Eagle (Post 12110821)
what was their response?

Knowing Shitstar he is probably still waiting. Makes Easyjet look like Emirates first class.

Jim Cannon 12-12-2014 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kayjay (Post 12110759)
Lack of escalator etiquette.
Those pairs of tossers who stand side by side ignorant to those in a hurry.
Want to throw them back down the bastard as they get to the top.

A good solution to this would be "Escalator Police" who stand at each end screaming loud abuse at offenders, before escorting them away on arrival at top or bottom for a good lesson in etiquette:D

EagleSE24 12-12-2014 10:41 AM

Fat people who, when walking, swing their arms almost parallel to the ground as they can't put them by their sides. As you try to overtake them on a London street or station, you risk a whack in the family jewels as they're generally short too.

danpalace07 12-12-2014 11:16 AM

People who sit next to you on an almost empty bus. Have a ******* word with yourselves, you morons. I don't like being the **** who puts my bag on the seat next to me but someone's got to make a stand, y'know?

Joe85 12-12-2014 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nork1 (Post 12110709)
Arseholes who abuse hospital staff. In the space of 10 minutes while visiting my dad in Mayday I heard one visitor call a doctor a **** and another who, after shouting at a nurse and saying she had no manners and no respect because she was on the phone then ran his arm along the desk sending phones and a pc monitor crashing to the floor.

I don't wish harm on anyone but should either of these ***** have the misfortune to develop a life threatening condition I sincerely hope they receive the treatment they deserve.

Scum.

I have to take issue with this, particularly the NHS. Firstly, I do have immense respect for the job the do, my son is currently in SCBU as he was born at 26 weeks.

But, having spent a lot of time in hospitals of late, the thing the annoys me is that you can sense that the Doctors, nurses etc don't work for you or appreciate that your paying there wages, they're not interested in customer care because they have no customers. They're generally not culpable when they're shit and there's this attitude of if you don't like it, **** off, mate. Probably just me having a shit time but everywhere I go I'm getting attitude from people and just generally poor service. I'll exclude SCBU from that they're brilliant, but Consultants, Doctors, Nurses and clerks just seem to think your another number as you got no choice, you gotta pay regardless.

Now having experienced private care, its a different world, you're directly paying them so customer care is a priority.

I'm not condoning abuse, its terrible but I totally get peoples frustrations.


I hope that makes some sense and I'm not coming across as a twat, but the last few weeks have left a bitter taste in my mouth with hospitals.

mushroom 12-12-2014 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe85 (Post 12111163)
I have to take issue with this, particularly the NHS. Firstly, I do have immense respect for the job the do, my son is currently in SCBU as he was born at 26 weeks.

But, having spent a lot of time in hospitals of late, the thing the annoys me is that you can sense that the Doctors, nurses etc don't work for you or appreciate that your paying there wages, they're not interested in customer care because they have no customers. They're generally not culpable when they're shit and there's this attitude of if you don't like it, **** off, mate. Probably just me having a shit time but everywhere I go I'm getting attitude from people and just generally poor service. I'll exclude SCBU from that they're brilliant, but Consultants, Doctors, Nurses and clerks just seem to think your another number as you got no choice, you gotta pay regardless.

Now having experienced private care, its a different world, you're directly paying them so customer care is a priority.

I'm not condoning abuse, its terrible but I totally get peoples frustrations.


I hope that makes some sense and I'm not coming across as a twat, but the last few weeks have left a bitter taste in my mouth with hospitals.

My Mrs works in a hospital and the stories she tells me are terrible.
Staff abused daily, people treating nurses/carers as skivvies (One lady yesterday kept on pressing her buzzer because she wanted someone to go buy her chocolate peanuts).
There was a lady who was having a routine op, didn't speak English but every time her family visited, they would start writing in a note book... turns out they were advised by a family member to keep notes so they could sue if they felt the care was insufficient (this is not a one off)... they have tried to sue once before. The would complain her water wasn't refreshed, and she was in danger of becoming dehydrated... she had 3 healthy family members who could have filled up her water at any time, but they all sat there while they summoned a nurse over to refresh her water from a water cooler less than 12ft from her bed!
The poor nurses that work on the dementia ward are assaulted almost daily.

Shipsisourking 12-12-2014 12:19 PM

Simon Cowell

The scouse accent

Paypal

Charity singles

The new 'let's grow a massive beard' craze

Dog owners who don't clean up rovers turds

Mama Mia the musical

Virgin trains guards

My next door neighbours chirpy "hello"

Call centres

Swans

My sat nav

And the fact I'm getting old.

Sp1Eagle 12-12-2014 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hull eagle (Post 12110538)
Bbs posters that wait until regular posters post then jump on the bandwagon

Or BBS posters who have to post when 2010 comment on a thread.

spike 12-12-2014 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joe85 (Post 12111163)
I have to take issue with this, particularly the NHS. Firstly, I do have immense respect for the job the do, my son is currently in SCBU as he was born at 26 weeks.
...
Now having experienced private care, its a different world, you're directly paying them so customer care is a priority.

I'm not condoning abuse, its terrible but I totally get peoples frustrations.

I hope that makes some sense and I'm not coming across as a twat, but the last few weeks have left a bitter taste in my mouth with hospitals.

You don't think the difference is that private staff have half the number of patients to deal with then?

Joe85 12-12-2014 12:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mushroom (Post 12111235)
My Mrs works in a hospital and the stories she tells me are terrible.
Staff abused daily, people treating nurses/carers as skivvies (One lady yesterday kept on pressing her buzzer because she wanted someone to go buy her chocolate peanuts).
There was a lady who was having a routine op, didn't speak English but every time her family visited, they would start writing in a note book... turns out they were advised by a family member to keep notes so they could sue if they felt the care was insufficient (this is not a one off)... they have tried to sue once before. The would complain her water wasn't refreshed, and she was in danger of becoming dehydrated... she had 3 healthy family members who could have filled up her water at any time, but they all sat there while they summoned a nurse over to refresh her water from a water cooler less than 12ft from her bed!
The poor nurses that work on the dementia ward are assaulted almost daily.

Yeh, you have to forgive my ignorance. Of course I don't see any of that and sounds terrible.

Joe85 12-12-2014 12:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spike (Post 12111286)
You don't think the difference is that private staff have half the number of patients to deal with then?

Fair point.

smileysmith 12-12-2014 12:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by danpalace07 (Post 12111160)
People who sit next to you on an almost empty bus. Have a ******* word with yourselves, you morons. I don't like being the **** who puts my bag on the seat next to me but someone's got to make a stand, y'know?

:lux::lux:


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