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Each pack contains the tears of at least a dozen sink estate kids. |
Itches in the middle of your back, your foot when driving or in unreachable parts of your scrotum.
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There's no such thing as an unreachable part of your scrotum. :p
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In a hurry there is, usually resulting in sensitive ball action.
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Taptalk and any other forum apps
Being directed to mobile sites instead of the full web page People that walk slow / cant walk in a ******* straight line / walk whilst texting etc - get out the ******* way because I will bin you over |
Click bait or whatever it is. "Blah blah blah and you'll never guess what happened" in a vain attempt to make you click to the story (connecting adverts).
Like that one the other week. "This man bought this homeless bloke a cup of coffee from Pret everyday on the way to work and you'll never guess how he repaid him". I thought that may be interesting, what happened? He gave him a Christmas card. Great. That's the least he could do IMO. 'Never guess' would be a more appropriate term if he gave him a rimming or bought him a car |
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It's probably on TheGliff.
PM Kirby. |
People that shorten 'potatoes' to 'pots'.
People that shorten 'radiators' to 'rads'. If I ever found myself in the situation where someone said 'my rads are so hot they could roast pots!' my temper and aggression would reach 'a silverback gorilla whose testicles had just been flicked by a wet towel' levels. |
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"what are you f****** doing, put it down you f****** little tramp" to a little girl, maybe 4 or 5, who picked something up off the pavement. One of the few times i've ever done the un-british thing and actually said something / got involved. |
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Who makes a t-shirt with that slogan in child size!! |
Seeing clueless parents on sidelines shout/give incorrect information to children playing Football. Although its mainly the shouting, it does much more negative than positive for the child believe me. We've all seen them.
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Things that annoy you
People that can't distinguish between 'bought' and 'brought'
"I brought a Mars bar for 60p the other day" "You took a Mars bar to 60p did you? Who's he?" |
Teachers who use Dr in their title.
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Coffee shops that brew their drinks too hot, particularly Americano's. Look, Caffe Nero, we both know you're average at best compared to most of the coffee shops in London but is not burning my tongue and losing the sense of taste for a couple of days too much to ask for?
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Adversely I bet there is a direct correlation between those that don't wear xmas jumpers, did not do the ice bucket challenge and put down those that watch the x - factor.
Whilst I am not fond of any of the above, people that feel the need to point out their superiority and ridicule the said collection of harmless people annoy me more. |
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